Hallelujah

The version of Leonard Cohen’s Hallelujah performed by Jeff Buckley, I listen to often. While there is lot of power in the lyrics of this song and the way Buckley performs it, I listen to it often as it reminds me of my friend Jason, for reasons connected and disconnected from any meaning one can interpret from such a powerful song. It reminds me of July 4th, 2018 when Marybeth threw a party for me, two days before I was to say goodbye, and invited all our friends, and Jason led us all, young and old, in an impromptu singing of Hallelujah. I remember feeling the power of the moment and how overwhelmed I was beginning to feel because I knew I was receiving a powerful energy that would last a life time. My journey has taught me to trust my deepest core to receive such energy by simply remaining present as deeply as I can in its moments, because, like a deep wellspring, such energy will make a dwelling in the depths of my being and sustain me over my lifetime. The fact that I listen to this song as often as I do must be this wellspring’s energy making its way to the surface. How do I even begin to express how powerfully loved and grateful it makes me feel? How do I begin to note the landscape of the infiniteness of this energy? Each visitation of this surfacing energy is a new and rich experience. This time, it is bringing to me the warmth of Jason and Marybeth’s home — the most loving home I will ever know — and in it all our friends brought together by Marybeth… I cannot write anymore, for now I feel one of the truest flows from this wellspring, the flow of tears, and I want it to flow unhindered all over of my being and take me on its sacred pilgrimage.